Masculinity: Vive la [sexy] différence!

You'll forgive me if I don’t have any life experience to bring to this topic. I'm not married. In fact, I’ve never even co-habitated with a romantic partner. But it won't always be so and that's why I'm paying close attention to Lori Gottlieb’s article about the dearth of sex in egalitarian marriages (Does a More Equal Marriage Mean Less Sex?) in which she suggests that couples who divide household responsibilities equally suffer from a lack of zing in the bedroom. Let’s get a little hurdle out of the way … [Read more...]

How to Rock a Bow Tie and a Mo: Q&A with Dan

We're standing side by side facing the mirror as he expertly gives me a tutorial on how to tie a bow tie. The ties are soft woollen ones and very malleable. Nevertheless, I fear that I'm destroying mine with my torturous manipulation of the fabric. In the end, I do manage to tie something around my neck that is recognizably a bow. But if there was such a thing as the … [Read more...]

Give Dick a Chance

She did it again! Margaret Wente lured me into her column with another snappy title; this time it was "What you won't learn about marriage in gender studies." I didn't think gender studies was supposed to teach me anything about marriage particularly, so I couldn't help but read the thing. … [Read more...]


Hello, I'm Brenda's body and I'm writing a guest blog post today. Brenda's brain is experiencing a bit of overload so she asked me too fill in.Brenda sometimes does what she calls "self-censoring", but a more accurate term would be "auto-censoring". Auto-censoring does not mean limiting what you express, but rather what you consume; you become the censor of your own media. Usually, Brenda auto-censors by … [Read more...]

The Feminist and the Cowboy — Book Club, 4th ed.

Yeehaw, giddyup -- that's how I feel about this book. At times it angered me, at other times I was nodding my head in agreement, and the rest of the time I just wanted to pour the author a nice soothing cup of tea and tell her to relax. The feminist of the title is author Alisa Valdes, a 40-something divorced mom. The cowboy is an older, rather conservative ranch manager. This memoir … [Read more...]

In Which We Celebrate Men! [not ironic]

Dear Men, This is my Valentine's Day love letter to you. I can't help but notice that us ladies often make casual remarks about how useless and clueless you men are without ever noticing how truly awesome you can be at times. I also see a pattern in pop culture representations of you as overgrown children unable to take care of yourselves or make intelligent decisions without a woman present. Those fictional men suck … [Read more...]