A [Bed]Room of One’s Own: Why I Sleep Alone

I'm coming out of the closet. Finally, I am ready to share my dirty little secret with you -- My mate and I sleep in separate bedrooms... and I like it that way! Would I love to snuggle up at night next to my Monsieur, fall gently into a blissful dreamworld and wake up 8 hours later resplendent and gazing deeply into his big heavy-lidded morning eyes? Yes, yes I would. Sadly, that is unlikely to ever happen. I am a notoriously … [Read more...]

How to Be Vulnerable (A Guide for You, Independent Lady)

As a woman with a sensitive heart and a tear that's never too far away, I spent the first part of my adulthood putting up a wall of invulnerability. And I've been spending the last few years painfully stripping away that wall and being frighteningly, pathetically vulnerable. A friend recently explained an epiphany she'd had -- A cute guy who was in her life for a few hours due to technical household difficulties twice offered to help her with something that fell outside of his professional duties. And twice she refused, only to realize later … [Read more...]

I wrote about Soul Mates

I submitted a guest blog post! Check it out on the Single Dating Diva: What It’s Like When You Finally Meet THE ONE. … [Read more...]

Masculinity: Vive la [sexy] différence!

You'll forgive me if I don’t have any life experience to bring to this topic. I'm not married. In fact, I’ve never even co-habitated with a romantic partner. But it won't always be so and that's why I'm paying close attention to Lori Gottlieb’s article about the dearth of sex in egalitarian marriages (Does a More Equal Marriage Mean Less Sex?) in which she suggests that couples who divide household responsibilities equally suffer from a lack of zing in the bedroom. Let’s get a little hurdle out of the way … [Read more...]

Valentine Love Disaster

Up until last year, I've always been wary of Valentine's Day and with reason. Prior to having met my Monsieur, I'd only had one good Valentine's Day surprise from a boy and I ruined it by giving him a card that said "I love you so much I could shit." Seriously, you can't make this stuff up. … [Read more...]

Dating, Internet Style

Online dating. Those 2 words can provoke intense reactions from the women in my life! Everything from fear (the ones who've never tried meeting random strangers online) to disgust (the ones who've been there, done that, and given up) to embarrassment (the ones who met their mate there) can be expected. I sympathize. Two things happened recently to make me revisit my own gone but not forgotten days of scrolling for dudes on the interweb: a couple of my friends have asked for my guidance as they dive in and give it a try, and I attended the wedding of a friend who met her terrific husband online. Full disclosure: I did not meet my beau on an internet dating site. But I did go on … [Read more...]

Gentlemen Prefer… Malibu Barbie?

"Ladies, meet my MILLIONAIRES!" Patti Stanger shouts before a group of gussied up women in cocktail dresses. Then, in walk the 2 fellows who are millionaires and who now get to pick from the cleavage and hair extension smögåsbord. I find it revolting and yet I can't look away. Yes, my name is Brenda and my guilty pleasure du jour is watching The Millionaire Matchmaker! … [Read more...]

Give Dick a Chance

She did it again! Margaret Wente lured me into her column with another snappy title; this time it was "What you won't learn about marriage in gender studies." I didn't think gender studies was supposed to teach me anything about marriage particularly, so I couldn't help but read the thing. … [Read more...]